Leaves on the Breeze
by Pandean
Summary: AU. When Leafpool has her kits in ThunderClan and has to deal with the consequences that come with it. But angry Clanmates are nothing compared to when WindClan demands one of the kits to live with them. Split from her siblings, Hollykit must learn the importance of her heritage and the Power of Three while Leafpool raises her family across the border.
1. Prologue

**AN: Hello all! Welcome to my second-ever Warriors fanfiction, Leaves on the Breeze. I had an AU I'd been thinking of forever and thought why not try it out? My first fanfic, Redemption, did pretty well so hopefully this one will too! It deals with an AU on if Squirrelflight didn't take Leafpool's kits as her own and the drama surrounding the clans due to that. I hope you enjoy!**

"I'm sorry, Leafpool, but I just can't." For a moment Leafpool couldn't believe she'd heard correctly. Squirrelflight couldn't? But why? Didn't she know how important this was-and if what Yellowfang said was true this might've been her only chance. Leafpool had to admit that she was more concerned with what would happen to her and her kits more than her sister's barren state, however. _It must make me a horrible sister, truly_. She worried at the ground with her paws when she felt the kits squirm inside of her. _Hush now, we'll figure this out._

"Why?" Leafpool made sure that the hurt was clear on her voice.

Squirrelflight sighed. "We can't lie to the Clan like that. Sooner or later the truth will come out and it will make things worse for everyone involved. I won't pretend they're mine but you're my sister, Leafpool, I'll protect you and your kits no matter what. You have to believe that." She set her tail on Leafpool's shoulders but despite that Leafpool still quivered with fear.

"I'm afraid for them," she whispered. "What if Firestar exiles us? Just because I'm his daughter doesn't mean he'll be lenient. He has to show no favoritism." She shivered at the thought. Would he at least wait until the kits were born before she was thrown out or would he kick her out while pregnant and leave her to fend for herself? Leafpool wasn't an idiot, she knew that by the time she got closer to kitting she would be in no shape to take care of herself. Even rogues usually had a mate with them but her mate was in WindClan and wouldn't even speak to her. And with leaf-bare coming...

"Firestar's not cruel, Leafpool. It will be alright. Trust me."

Leafpool nodded wearily and started on the path back to camp. She would have to tell Firestar soon. And Cinderpelt. Oh, Cinderpelt! How could she have messed up so, so horribly? Her mentor was dead because of her and she'd promised to go on and take care of the Clan but now? She would be breaking her promise to her beloved mentor.

Dry leaves and bracken crunched underneath her paws and a cool breeze made her fur ruffle. When the two of them entered the hollow, a few cats called a greeting out which Squirrelflight replied to. Leafpool didn't even think she could talk. Casting her gaze around the camp, she saw Firestar headed into his den and she swallowed. It was now or never.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Squirrelflight's heart went out for her sister. She looked so terrified standing by the HighLedge. It'd been a few hours since she'd come out of Firestar's den and immediately curled into her nest. Squirrelflight tried to ask her what happened but nothing came from it. In the time Firestar had briefly chatted with their mothert and most of the patrols had come back. Now he'd called a Clan meeting and both sisters knew that whatever came from it, it wouldn't be good.

"As you know," Firestar said "A moon ago Leafpool left with Crowfeather only to come back to help us when she knew her Clan was in danger." There was a long silence as Leafpool shrunk even lower into a crouch, her tail wrapped around her like she was trying to protect the babies growing inside. Again, Squirrelflight felt the spasm of panic and pain coming from her sister and wished she could take it away. But no, she wouldn't have lied and said they were hers and Brambleclaw's. She knew, _she knew_ , that such a lie would come back to bite them. She had to have faith that her father would do the right thing.

"During the time she was away, a few things went on that neither of them gave any thought to, however, it's apparent we must give a thought to it now." Firestar continued, taking a deep breath. "Leafpool is carrying Crowfeather's kits."

To say there was an uproar would have been an understatement. Ashfur hissed his glare penetrating her sister before turning onto her. They seemed to be taunting her as if to say _your family is ruined anyway now._ Squirrelflight had to hold back a hiss as well. The damn tomcat was just impossible to get along with now that she was with Brambleclaw again. It wasn't like they'd even been mates for StarClan's sake! Somewhere in the crowd, Mousefur was spitting about how she knew Leafpool was a traitor and no good, and Dustpelt sneered.

"So, is she going to be exiled?" Thornclaw called. "She broke a code-no, two codes! Don't tell me she gets off lightly!"

Cats mewed their agreements and Leafpool's fear scent began to fill the hollow until Firestar yowled for silence. "I have not decided yet whether to-"

"Firestar?" A quiet mew cut him off as Daisy stepped out of the nursery. Her kits were playing by her feet and her eyes were unsure, but she had a look of determination to her. "May I ask a question or two?"

Firestar nodded toward the cream colored queen and Daisy took another long breath before speaking.

"Leafpool, when you ran away with Crowfeather, you weren't planning on coming back where you?"

Leafpool slowly shook her head. "No, I thought we were going to leave the territory and be with each other forever. I didn't think we'd ever come back. But then Midnight came and told us about the badgers and we couldn't just do nothing...and then Cinderpelt died and I promised to protect the Clan and leave the part of me that was in love with Crowfeather behind."

Daisy nodded slowly before continuing. "So, when you mated it was under the assumption that you were no longer Clan cats and thus were not ThunderClan's Medicine Cat apprentice or a WindClan warrior but two loner or rogue cats?"

Squirrelflight's ear twitched. What exactly was the ex-loner getting at?

"W-well, yes." Leafpool said.

"Then since your actions were done under the circumstances that you believed you were no longer going to be Clan cats and not come back as ThunderClan's medicine cat, surely the code isn't technically broken." Daisy continued. "But due to an event you couldn't forsee, you decided that the Clan was more important after the fact. It wouldn't make sense to blame you for an action you did while under the idea you no longer had a code."

By this time Leafpool had stopped trembling so much and a few cats were nodding. Squirrelflight was shocked-they were actually agreeing with the ex-loner? Not that it was a bad thing-if it helped her sister it could only be good-but she didn't think that _Daisy_ of all cats would be the one to turn the tide. The queen had been terrified ever since the battle with the badgers and would barely come out of the nursery.

Ferncloud stepped forward to stand next to Daisy. "She has a point, Firestar. If Dustpelt and I had been from different Clans and decided to leave them behind, we probably wouldn't have factored in any freak battle either. I mean, who would know that the badgers were going to attack? We'd never experienced it before. Kits happen , whether they intend to or not. I think most queens would agree."

Dustpelt's mouth was agape in shock of what his mate had said but she just rolled her eyes. "Hush, you. We became mates right after I got my warrior name. Don't even tell me you didn't freak out when you realized how soon later I was having kits."

" _Toms._ " Sorreltail murmured. She still looked weak from her kitting but she stood with as much strength as she could to speak. "Leafpool saved my life during the kitting once Cinderpelt had gone. She's one of my best friends and I know that she stayed here because she really, really cares about the health and safety of ThunderClan. She could have left again one more to join Crowfeather and let Brightheart or someone else assume the medicine cat position, but she didn't. I think Daisy's right. She couldn't have known she was going to come back."

The clearing below the HighLedge was quite until Firestar spoke once more. "Thank you, Daisy, Ferncloud, and Sorreltail for your input. You make a very good point. We are ThunderClan and we aren't so cruel as to exile expecting queens or young kits. Leafpool will stay and have her litter and we will discuss the situation with WindClan. When the kits leave the nursery, Leafpool will search for a new apprentice, StarClan willing, and once that apprentice earns their name Leafpool will begin warrior training. This discussion is over."

Squirrelflight rushed over to her sister and let her lean against her. She was shaking so hard that she thought she might collapse. "See, I told you the Clan wouldn't exile you."

"Some of the others aren't convinced." Leafpool said, her eyes resting on where Mosuefur and Thornclaw were enaged in a heated discussion.

"Well, that's their problem." Daisy came over, her plumy tail coming to rest around Leafpool's shoulders. "Let's get you settled. So much stress isn't good for the kits. I swear, _toms_ , they know nothing about anything."

Leafpool let out a raspy, half-hearted purr as she was lead into the nursery by Daisy. Ferncloud and Sorreltail closed in around her, all mewing softly.

Squirrelflight felt warm inside, maybe, just maybe, this would work out just fine.

 **AN: So there's the prologue for Leaves on the Breeze! Next is the Allegiances and Chapter 1! Let me know what you think. I know Daisy and the Queens are a little different than in the books but I wanted to prioritize and show how influencial the queens are to the clans because they deserve that being showcased a bit more. Leave a review if you want to!**


	2. Allegiances

**A/N: This is the allegiances for Leaves on the Breeze. It's a little different than the original ones because of the changes made in the prologue.**

 **Leader** :

 **Firestar** -ginger tom with a flame-colored pelt

 **Deputy** :

 **Brambleclaw** -dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes  
 **Apprentice, Berrypaw**

 **Medicine Cat(s)** :

 **Leafpool** -light brown tabby she-cat with amber eyes (temporary position, nursing Crowfeather's kits)

 **Warriors** :

 **Dustpelt** -dark brown tabby tom  
 **Apprentice, Hazelpaw**

 **Sandstorm** -pale ginger she-cat  
 **Apprentice, Honeypaw**

 **Cloudtail** -long-haired white tom  
 **Apprentice, Cinderpaw**

 **Brackenfur** -golden brown tabby tom

 **Thornclaw** -golden brown tabby tom  
 **Apprentice, Poppypaw**

 **Brightheart** -white she-cat with ginger patches

 **Ashfur** -pale gray (with darker flecks) tom, dark blue eyes

 **Sorreltail** -tortoiseshell and white she-cat with amber eyes

 **Spiderleg** -long-limbed black tom with brown underbelly and amber eyes  
 **Apprentice, Mousepaw**

Squirrelflight-dark ginger she-cat with green eyes

 **Brook Where Small Fish Swim (Brook)** -brown tabby she-cat with gray eyes, formerly of the Tribe of Rushing Water

 **Stormfur** -dark gray tom with amber eyes, formerly of RiverClan

 **Whitewing** -white she-cat with green eyes

 **Birchfall** -light brown tabby tom

 **Apprentices** :

 **Berrypaw** -cream-colored tom

 **Hazelpaw** -small gray and white she-cat

 **Mousepaw** -gray and white tom

 **Cinderpaw** -gray tabby she-cat

 **Honeypaw** -light brown tabby she-cat

 **Poppypaw** -tortoiseshell she-cat

 **Queens** :

 **Ferncloud** -pale gray (with darker flecks) she-cat, green eyes, mother of Dustpelt's kits: Icekit and Foxkit

 **Daisy** -cream long-furred cat from the horseplace

Leafpool-Light brown tabby she-cat with amber eyes, mother of Crowfeather's kts: Lionkit, Hollykit, and Jaykit

 **Elders** :

 **Longtail** -pale tabby tom with black stripes, retired early due to failing sight

 **Mousefur** -small dusky brown she-cat

 **Leader** :

 **Blackstar** -large white tom with huge jet-black paws

 **Deputy** :

 **Russetfur** -dark ginger she-cat

 **Medicine Cat(s)** :

 **Littlecloud** -very small tabby tom

 **Warriors** :

 **Oakfur** -small brown tom

 **Rowanclaw** -ginger tom  
 **Apprentice, Ivypaw**

 **Smokefoot** -black tom  
 **Apprentice, Owlpaw**

 **Snowbird** -pure white she-cat

 **Apprentices** :

 **Ivypaw** -

 **Owlpaw**

 **Queens** :

 **Tawnypelt** -tortoiseshell she-cat with green eyes

 **Elders** :

 **Cedarheart** -dark gray tom

 **Tallpoppy** -long-legged light brown tabby she-cat

 **Leader** :

 **Onestar** -brown tabby tom

 **Deputy** :

 **Ashfoot** -gray she-cat

 **Medicine Cat(s)** :

 **Barkface** -short-tailed brown tom  
 **Apprentice, Kestrelpaw**

 **Warriorrs**

 **Tornear** -tabby tom  
 **Apprentice, Harepaw**

 **Weaselfur** -ginger tom with white paws

 **Crowfeather** -dark gray tom  
 **Owlwhisker** -light brown tabby tom

 **Queens:**

 **Whitetail** -small white she-cat, mother of Onestar's kit, Heatherkit, Emberkit, and Willowkit

 **Nightcloud** -black she-cat, mother of Tornear's kits, Sootkit and Darkkit. Both kits deceased. 

**Apprentices** :

 **Kestrelpaw** **: brown tom with speckled fur**

 **Harepaw: Brown and white tom**

 **Elders** :

 **Morningflower** -very old tortoiseshell queen

 **Webfoot** -dark gray tabby tom

 **Leader** :

 **Leopardstar** -unusually spotted golden tabby she-cat

 **Deputy** :

 **Mistyfoot** -gray she-cat with blue eyes  
 **Apprentice, Dapplepaw**

 **Medicine Cat(s)** :

 **Mothwing** -dappled golden she-cat  
 **Apprentice, Willowpaw**

 **Warriors** :

 **Blackclaw** -smoky black tom

 **Voletooth** -small brown tabby tom  
 **Apprentice, Minnowpaw**

 **Reedwhisker** -black tom  
 **Apprentice, Pouncepaw**

 **Mosspelt** -tortoiseshell she-cat with blue eyes  
 **Apprentice, Pebblepaw**

 **Beechfur** -light brown tom

 **Rippletail** -dark gray tabby tom

 **Apprentices** :

 **Dapplepaw** -

 **Willowpaw** -

 **Minnowpaw** -

 **Pouncepaw** -

 **Pebblepaw** -

 **Queens** :

 **Dawnflower** -pale gray she-cat

 **Elders** :

 **Heavystep** -thickset tabby tom

 **Swallowtail** -dark tabby she-cat

 **Stonestream** -gray tom


	3. Chapter 1: Family

**A/N: Hey everyone, this is the first chapter for Leaves on the Breeze! I hope you enjoy it! As you can tell by the allegiances, some things will be different. This takes place in between Sunset and The Sight, so right now Leafpool's kits are still young enough to need milk but aren't completely helpless. That means other apprentices that were the same age as the Three are also mainly kits. The POV will switch some which you'll know when there is a XOXOXOXOXOXOXO. Enjoy!**

 **Chapter 1: Family**

Leafpool thought the hardest thing she'd have to do was give birth to her kits. It was not like the Clan treated her badly during the birth or even before. Of course, she got glares and whispers from some cats but Daisy and Ferncloud were always there to chase them away. She'd grown close to the ex-loner during her time in the nursery. Daisy while not a fighter, had a type of courage that many of the warriors lacked. A mother's courage, she called it. Both queens treated her with respect. While respect wasn't the word for most of her Clanmates reactions, at least they treated her somewhat like a normal queen. She was fed first and looked after with minimal sneering. When the time came to give birth to her kits, Barkface came from WindClan to help the delivery.

Leafpool was incredibly grateful she hadn't been there when Firestar traveled to WindClan to let them know. But Onestar had come down to their territory with Crowfeather in tow right after. She remembered with a shudder that since the kits were have WindClan, it was proposed that one be raised in WindClan as a loyal cat. She had no choice in the matter. Her paws were truly tied.

And now here she was, staring at Onestar from her spot in the clearing. Her kits were tumbling around, playing with joyful mews. Hollykit was the spitting image of her father, while Lionkit looked a bit like her, Jaykit's muted grey pelt took after his father too, his blue eyes bright but blind. One of these kits would leave her forever. It wouldn't be Jaykit, she knew that Onestar wouldn't ever choose a blind kit. But the other two...one of them would be leaving.

"I thought you said we were going to wait for them to be weaned?" she said, approaching the leader. He had Crowfeather, the deputy Ashfoot, and another she-cat with him. All three cats were colored in varying shades of gray and black.

"We had no queens that could nurse at the time," Onestar said. "However, Nightcloud," he nodded to other she-cat, "Lost her litter very suddenly due to a cold snap. They were born too early and weak. However she still has all her milk and I think this would go better. The less attachments to the birth clan, the better."

Leafpool wanted to wail. There were her _kits_ he was taking about! Not some objects. At the same time, she caught sadness in the queen's gaze and her heart went out for her.

"That makes sense," Firestar stepped forward. "It will be easier for them to move on and grow with the little memory they have."

"They're my kits! I'm their mother! They need to remember me!" Leafpool did yowl this time, causing the kits to look at their mother and rush over.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Hollykit was the first one to here mother. She always was the fastest of the three of them. Granted, Jaykit couldn't see so he didn't often run as much but she was faster than Lionkit so that was something. Leafpool's face was contorted in a grimace but she managed to look back at her and sat "It's fine, Hollykit. Just a discussion."

Hollykit looked at the other strange cats. They didn't smell like the ones from ThunderClan. Trotting up to one of them, she unceremoniously pushed her nose into the tom's brown flank. "You smell different! Like the wind and grass. I like it."

A dark gray she-cat purred at the sight. "Yep, that's definitely Crowfeather's kit."

Hollykit backed away from the brown tabby, her ears pinned against her head. Crowfeather? She knew very little about the tom other than he was supposed to be her father and he wasn't from ThunderClan. She'd heard Mousefur say once that he was a good-for-nothing-medicine-cat-thief once though when no one thought she'd heard anything. When she asked about it, no one would tell her though.

She wasn't stupid. Something told her that her mother wasn't supposed to have kits. No one ever said anything, of course, but it was a feeling deep inside of her. Hollykit could swear sometimes she just knew what other cats wanted. Some were easy to tell apart; Longtail longed for his eyesight back, Firestar missed Graystripe, Brook would think about how the mountains were so pretty this time of year and Stormfur missed his sister, simple things like that. Her mother wasn't simple though. A part of her loved that she had kits, wanted to never let them go, but another part told her she shouldn't. So her desire seemed to come across as half-hearted. Not entirely sure of itself.

But no matter what the feeling deep inside of her said, Hollykit knew Leafpool loved her.

The cats were all conversing again, Hollykit missing it while she was deep in thought. She padded over to Lionkit and Jaykit, both looking astonished. "Did you know what you just did?" Lionkit whispered.

"You _sniffed_ the leader of WindClan!" Jaykit didn't wait for her to answer. "You _sniffed_ him!"

Hollykit's fur grew hot. "How do you know he was the leader of WindClan? You can see him!"

"No, but I can hear everyone talking mouse-brain!" Jaykit flicked his tail to take some of the bite out of his scathing words. She knew her brother wanted to be a warrior more than anything else but he was also terrified his blindness would make it impossible. Privately, Hollykit thought that it didn't matter if he could land a hit on someone. His words were cutting enough to leave a cat bleeding on the ground.

"You're telling me I just sniffed the _leader of WindClan!"_ Hollykit gasped. That was not good! Why didn't some cat say something before she pressed her nose into his pelt! Surely she'd shamed all of ThunderClan with such blatant disrespect.

"Why is he even here anyways?" Lionkit asked, licking a paw and drawing it over his ear to get the dirt from behind it.

Jaykit rolled his blind eyes. "Neither of you ever listen. He's here about us!"

Hollykit felt a shiver go down her spine. Them? What about them? Sure, Crowfeather was their father but it wasn't like he often came to camp to see them. And she couldn't remember when the other two she-cats ever came. She was going to shrug it off but then she heard Leafpool wail in distress again. Her claws came out. Some cat was hurting her mother and she was going to stop them!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Squirrelflight's heart was breaking like the kits were her own. She placed her tail on Leafpool's shoulders, hoping to calm the mourning queen. "It's better this way, for them." If only that made a difference. They might not remember, but Leafpool would never forget. Still, she could almost feel the pain radiating off her sister. She wanted to curse StarClan, ask them how they could ever inflict such torment on a young cat but she stayed silent. There was nothing she could do.

"I know," Leafpool whimpered. All her kits had come to press against her belly. "It's better this way."

"What's better?" Hollykit asked, causing another tremor to go through her mother.

Squirrelflight watched as Crowfeather, Nightcloud, and Ashfoot came to stand in front of the three kits. Onestar stood a ways away, trying to give the broken family some privacy. It made her shoulder fur raise. Kits belonged with their mother's clan! He shouldn't have any say over it. But he'd easily threatened that they would fight for their right for one of their kits and that due to the nature of their birth it was only right that they got to raise one as well. At least Squirrelflight wasn't worried about the idea of them being mistreated. Granted, Ashfoot was Crowfeather's mother and probably thrilled at the idea of grandkits no matter which Clan blood ran through their veins and Nightcloud had the same motherly gaze in her eye that she caught in Leafpools.

It made her heart hurt, knowing she'd never look at kits that way. Of course the three were precious to her but she would never know kits of her own. It wasn't fair. But she guessed that was how everything worked.

"Hello," Ashfoot bent her head to get at the kits eye level. "I'm your grandmother."

"No! Sandstorm is our grandmother, liar!" Jaykit hissed.

"Stupid," Hollykit chided. "Sandstorm is Leafpool's mother! So Ashfoot must be Crowfeather's!" Her face then scrunched up as she tried to process the information. "So...we have three mothers? Something like that."

"Well, she does look a little like you and Jaykit," Lionkit commented upon further study.

"Well, that's something I wouldn't know, now isn't it?"

"Don't be rude, Jaykit." Leafpool scolded softly. Inwardly Squirrelflight was a little proud. Jaykit definitely got the sharp tongue from her and Sandstorm.

The three cats went back to Onestar and talked quietly for a moment. The patrols that had headed back into the camp looked on and those working on rebuilding since the badgers also stopped. It was as if everyone knew what was about to happen. Everyone except the ones that mattered. Leafpool crouched closer to her precious kits, licking their ears as they complained.

Onestar and Crowfeather came back to them and Squirrelflight resisted the urge to hiss at the sight of the black tom. He ruined everything. First his little tryst with Feathertail, who died to save him, next his affair with Leafpool, whose status was now ruined, StarClan help the fate of whatever poor she-cat becomes his third mate. A tree might fall and break her spine for all the luck those she-cats had.

"I've made my decision," Crowfeather said, locking eyes with Leafpool. Both of them were filled with a torrid of emotions. Sadness, regret, grief, love, fear. She wished she could take them all away-well, Leafpool's anyway. "I promise I'll take care of her, Leafpool."

Nightcloud came beside Crowfeather. "I promise that I'll treat her as my own."

The tom bent down to pick Hollykit up by the scruff. She lashed out, kicking but couldn't get free of him.

"Leafpool!" she wailed. "Leafpool! What's going on!"

"You're going to WindClan to live with your father." It was Onestar who answered. "Crowfeather and Nightcloud will take good care of you."

Hollykit wasn't having it. Squirrelflight saw her squirm and thrash, shouting out her mother's name as loud as her tiny mouth could. But Leafpool didn't respond and Squirrelfight could see the spark in her sister's eyes burning out.

 **A/N:**

 **So, how do you like this chapter? What did you think of the changes I made? One of the biggest changes in this is Hollykit will be one of the Three, which will be interesting since she's in a different Clan!**

 **Next chapter: Hollykit's new life in WindClan and how she deals with it and life for Leafpool and the gang without Hollykit.**


	4. Chapter 2: Adjustment

Chapter 2: Adjustment

At first Hollykit had tried to rebel and sneak back to the ThunderClan camp. That, of course, had ended up disastrously as she could barely make it outside the WindClan camp before her tiny legs got tired and her belly roared for milk. It was easy for Crowfeather, Nightcloud, or really any other cat in the area to then pick her tiny form up and return her back to the nursery.

When she realized escaping wouldn't work, she decided that she would never have Nightcloud's milk, only Leafpool's and if they didn't want her to starve to death then they would return her to her mother that instant. Of course, after moonhigh came and went without her feeding, she found it hard to resist Nightcloud's milky scent and comforting voice.

Nightcloud, like all cats, she came into contact with, had desires. Hollykit could feel the pain she felt when her own kits had passed and the joy at being able to raise another, to be given a second chance. It was a warm, pure feeling. No thorn in her heart that she was not of her blood, but some untouched love Hollykit had only felt from her actual mother. So, hating Nightcloud was also out of the picture.

Her father was a bit easier. When he came to the nursery-which wasn't often-he was awkward and not all there. Nothing like when Brambleclaw would come and play with them. Everyone knew he and Squirrelfight couldn't have kits so they loved Leafpool's like their own. No, Crowfeather wouldn't play with her or give her any gifts. He'd ask her how her day was in that hesitant tone of his, awkwardly looking away when inquiring more than the simple 'fine' she gave him. She could more easily ignore him even though somewhere inside of her she did sense he was trying. He wasn't trying very well, in her opinion, but he was at least trying.

Whitetail was also in the nursery and Hollykit soon learned that she was Onestar's mate. She had three kits herself, Heatherkit, Willowkit, and Emberkit. Willowkit and Heatherkit were okay, but Emberkit acted as if StarClan themselves came and told him he was the greatest cat ever.

These cats became her constant and she found that they weren't that horrible, but her heart ached for her real mother and ThunderClan.

* * *

Across the border, Leafpool mourned. Privately, of course, and with no one the wiser to her pain. She should be grateful, she had two of her kits. Little Lionkit who grew fiercer by the day and Jaykit, who might've been blind but had a personality that more than made up for it. They wore her out, but in a good way and her heart was filled with love for them. She had given up everything for these kits and she was going to make sure their lives were the best they ever had.

Ferncloud was grooming her new kits, Icekit and Foxkit. She looked tired, probably because she hadn't had a good night's sleep since the birth. "You doing alright, Ferncloud?"

The she-cat sighed. "Oh, I'm fine. You know how it is. It's nice we have Daisy here, now. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I miss Mousepaw, Hazelpaw, and even Berrypaw!"

Daisy, who was keeping a close eye on Jaykit as he tumbled around outside after a leaf, purred. "Even Berrypaw? That tom is a little menace. I wish Brambleclaw all the luck he can get! Though whoever trains Jaykit will certainly need it too!"

Leafpool purred. "I can already tell Foxkit will be quite the menace as well," she motioned to the squirming kit who was currently climbing over his sister.

Ferncloud moved him back gently with one paw. "We should have a contest. Which can drive their mentors crazier than a fox in a fit fastest."

Here with the queens, Leafpool felt something inside of her that she hadn't felt in a long time. A steady calmness, a soothing feeling that spread all the way through her. She wondered if this was something they all felt and if she would lose it once she left the nursery. What would she even do? She would train a replacement, of course by Firestar's orders, and that replacement would take over for her. But was she really cut out to be a warrior? She could hunt okay and she knew a bit of fighting, since that was required of medicine cat apprentices, but she mainly focused on what she thought would be her job for the rest of her life. Instead, she was going to go back to training. She sighed, could she really contribute to her clan as a warrior?

"I know what you're thinking," Daisy murmured. The cream colored she-cat had come to lay beside her. She licked her ear soothingly. "You're like me. Neither of us are really made for the life of a warrior but that doesn't mean we can't help the Clan. I've been thinking of propositioning to Firestar something, but I haven't told anyone. Would you like to hear?"

Leafpool's ears perked up. "Sure." Upon entering the nursery Leafpool had found Daisy was much more than she seemed to be. The terrified, hysterical she-cat that came to the Clans was actually very smart, caring, and determined. Not to mention braver than she could imagine, for daring to come here and change her life for her kits.

Daisy curled her tail around her. "I know I'll always be in the nursery, helping even though I don't have kits. I think it's good for the queens since it will allow them more freedom. Ferncloud agrees with me. However, I know that I'm not much of a fighter and Ferncloud confided to me her...less than stellar training at the paws of Darkstripe." The she-cat shuddered delicately. Leafpool never met the traitorous tom that almost cost Sorreltail her life, but she'd heard stories. "Wouldn't it be good to have a warrior who, while fully trained, is dedicated solely to the camp and clan itself? Defending the nursery and elders, repairing, learning the camp inside and out so they can prepare the best defenses while battles go on? And helping those in the Clan who need it...not with physical hurts but with things that are deeper."

"What do you mean, deeper?" Leafpool asked, intrigued.

"I mean, there are some injuries that can't be seen. Like," Daisy hesitated before continuing, "Ashfur, for example. I know Squirrelflight didn't mean anything by it and feels terribly, but he seems to be going through a lot of pain inside. Maybe we could have a cat that can be there to talk, deal with that pain, help them. It would be like a medicine cat but different. And I think it would take a very special cat. I think you could be that cat."

Something burned inside Leafpool, a feeling she didn't quite understand but liked nonetheless.

"I think that's a wonderful idea."

* * *

4 Moons Later

Despite her struggle, the memory of Leafpool and her brothers soon faded out of Hollykit's mind. Sure, she knew they existed, that Nightcloud wasn't her real mother even if they looked so alike, but the individual memories were all blurry. Hollykit found as time went on, it didn't bother her.

Like now, she sprung at Heatherkit and the two she-kits tumbled through the high grass. "Got you!" she crowed.

Heatherkit rolled over. "Now I get to be the rabbit!"

Cat-and-Rabbit was a game they devised that was a little...different. It started when Webfoot had told them the story of the Wild Hare; a hare, who, tired of the cats of WindClan chasing down her family one by one without respecting them as part of the cycle of life, was granted the ability by StarClan to converse with cats and have a Warrior's Spirit. She spent days deciding what to do, until she found a group of apprentices eating before feeding the Clan and attacked. She pounced on the apprentices and asked to be taken to the leader. In fear of the hare, the apprentices did as she asked and the hare declared to the leader that StarClan had spoken to her and gave her her abilities in order to tell the WindClan cats to respect their prey. In the end, WindClan agreed under the threat that if they ever stopped then the hare would come back to pounce on unsuspecting apprentices.

So, instead of the cat pouncing on the rabbit, the rabbit got to catch the cat.

Hollykit raced through the tall grass, slinking low to hide her dark pelt. Behind her, Heatherkit's pawsteps made the stalks rustle and as she pounced, the black she-kit dodged. Heatherkit skidded for a second before getting back in control and started the chase. They'd often seen their fathers working on the racing track and learned that there was much more to running than they thought originally.

"Surrender, for I am the mighty Hare!" Heatherkit cried.

"Never! I am Hollythorn, the best warrior in WindClan and I will take what I deserve!" Hollykit pretended to swipe at her playmate.

Heatherkit tackled Hollykit and the two kits continued to roll right into a group of warriors.

"Oof!" Hollykit squealed and quickly got to her paws. Thankfully, the three cats they'd ran into were twitching their whiskers in amusement.

"You kits be careful you don't roll into the fresh kill pile!" Tornear, a cat who originally terrified all the kits, said. "We might mistake you for prey!"

"Prey that attacks back!" Heatherkit boasted.

"You're more brown than black with all that dirt, Hollykit," Hollykit groaned as Crowfeather grabbed her by the scruff right in front of the other warriors and began to wash her.

"Crowfeather!" She whined. "Lemme go, this is embarrassing."

Crowfeather flicked his tail but continued cleaning. "You should've thought about that before bumping into me."

Heatherkit chuckled before _her_ father grabbed her by her scruff. "None of that, now."

"C'mon, really?" she groaned.

"Kits," Flylight purred, coming next to the group of toms. "They have you wrapped around their paws."

"Hmm," Crowfeather flicked his tail at the ginger and white tomcat. "It's not like you haven't been padding after Gorsetail since she became a warrior."

Flylight spluttered. "It's not like that!"

"Sure," Crowfeather muttered. "And rabbits fly."

"So," Tornear asked the two kits. "Who do you think your mentors are going to be? You're getting to that age."

"I'm not sure," Hollykit said. She'd never really thought about it. Who would be good for her? Would they think she wouldn't be as good of a warrior because she was half ThunderClan? She knew it was basically forbidden to mention n any way deogratory of her, but she still wondered if some of the cats thought something was wrong with her because of it.

It didn't matter, she'd prove she would be the best warrior she could be.

"I think Weaselfur would be a good mentor," Heatherkit ventured. "Or Brackenwing."

"Well, you still have almost a whole moon to think about it. But Onestar will make sure you get good mentors."

Hollykit nodded to herself. Onestar would make sure that she was given the best cat possible for her. But the unease that she felt still wouldn't leave as she continued playing with Heatherkit. It was only when night had come and she'd curled up with Nightcloud, comforted by her familiar scent, that she finally felt at ease.


	5. Chapter 3: First Contact

**Hi guys! Sorry for taking such a long time to update! I was in rehab but I'm out now.**

 **About some of the cats names: The WindClan allegiances during Sunset and The Sight are pretty sparse so I basically am picking cat names from older allegiances and/or making them up SO if you'd like to send some OCs for WindClan, RiverClan, and ShadowClan, (or rogue/kittypet) please go for it! I cannot promise they'll all be used but I will try! I need a name, rank, clan, description, personality, and maybe a bit of history of the character! Thank you!)**

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Hollykit squirmed uncomfortably as Nightcloud groomed her. She couldn't handle the indignity. She was going to be an apprentice, she could clean herself! "I-am-not-a-kit-anymore!" she mewed in between her mother's licks.

Nightcloud purred with amusement. "You'll always be my kit, Hollykit."

"Not to mention your name still ends with -kit," Emberpaw-who'd become an apprentice a quarter-moon ago crowed. Hollykit flattened her ears as well as she could while being groomed.

A light brown blur streaked through the sky and Emberpaw found himself sprawling in the dirt. "Don't be a jerk, Emberpaw." Heatherpaw placed her two front paws on his chest. "When the time comes she'll beat you up!"

"Don't be so sure!" Emberpaw crowed. "The best warrior in WindClan is training me!"

"Well, soon I'll be the best warrior in WindClan!" Hollykit shot back. "So just you wait!"

Crowfeather purred in amusement as he came up. "I see they're arguing again."

"We're not _arguing!_ " Hollykit said, fur fluffing up with indignity. "We're spiritually debating our differences of opinion!"

That only made Crowfeather purr harder.

Nightcloud finally finished grooming Hollykit and she had to fight hard to continue keeping still. Starclan knew she'd just have to go through it once more if she ended up dashing somewhere and getting dirty. That would not please her mother at all.

From the mouth of the nursery, Hollykit could see Onestar climbing up the Tallrock. He let out a yowl. "Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey join here beneath the Tallrock for a clan meeting!"

"It's time!" Heatherpaw squealed. "Oh, we're going to have so much fun as apprentices together! I'll help you make your nest and everything! I already found a space!"

"She moved my nest out of the way to do it."

"Oh Starclan, keep your muzzle closed Emberpaw." Willowpaw trod up beside them and swiped a white paw around her grey ears. "I swear you chatter as much as a starling but only look half so appetizing."

"She-cats!" Emberpaw lashed his tail and trod to sit next to his mention. Gorsetail eyed him oddly and bent down to whisper something in his ear.

"Like Gorsetail isn't a she-cat?" Hollykit muttered.

"Enough you all," Whitetail began urging her kits away. "Or I'll make Onestar send you back to the nursery for another moon."

"You wouldn't!" Willowpaw said.

"Try me."

Whitetail herded her kits away to sit near the Tallrock; Nightcloud and Crowfeather followed, Hollykit trailing a bit behind. Worry was sitting in her stomach like a tough bit of fresh kill. What if no one wanted to be her mentor? What if she wasn't good enough for anyone? What if she made a mistake and embarrassed herself in front of the whole clan?

"You'll be fine," Nightcloud ran her tail over Hollykit's back, smoothing the fluffing up fur.

Crowfeather gave her a lick on the head before going to sit near the other warriors. Hollykit's ears quivered as she went up with Nightcloud to where the other cats were gathering. Her belly was fluttering so much she couldn't tell whether it was from nerves or excitement. Maybe a mix of both. A wave of feeling came off from Nightcloud as forceful as the moor wind during a storm. Hollykit's pelt prickled as she felt Nightcloud's desire to scoop her up and take her back to the nursery and never let her out again. Quickly she rubbed her head under her mother's chin to reassure her.

"I'll always be here with you."

Nightcloud licked her shoulder. "I know."

"Hollykit, come forward." Onestar called from the Tallrock and it was all she could do to keep from bounding up to him like a rabbit. " Hollykit, you have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Hollypaw. Your mentor will be Ashfoot. I hope Ashfoot will pass down all she knows on to you."

Hollypaw stifled a gasp. Ashfoot was the Clan deputy and she was her own grandmother! Hollypaw knew that it wasn't often that kin were paired together as apprentice and mentor but that meant Onestar really trusted both of them to do a good job if he decided to do it. Ashfoot stepped forward, a proud look in her eyes. She had wanted grandkits all her life and now she was going to train one, it was a dream come true. Hollypaw swore silently that she would be the bet apprentice ever for Ashfoot.

"Ashfoot, you are ready to take on an apprentice. You had received excellent training from Mudclaw, and you have shown yourself to be loyal and determined. You will be the mentor of Hollypaw, and I expect you to pass on all you know to her."

Hollypaw trotted up to Ashfoot and pressed noses with her. "I promise to be the best, most loyal WindClan apprentice _ever_." She whispered.

Ashfoot purred. "I'm sure you will."

"Hollypaw! Hollypaw!" Hollypaw's fur felt warm as her Clanmates cheered her new name. Heatherpaw came running up to her, her sister and brother on her heels.

"You're going to do great!" She mewed with excitement. "You need to make your nest! There are some really good places near the ThunderClan border for moss, I can show you!" Heatherpaw then glanced at Ashfoot. "I mean, if your mentor is okay with it."

Ashfoot purred. "That would work wonderfully. Crowfeather did mention he wanted you to get some more moss for the elders, I'm sure he wouldn't mind coming along."

Hollypaw almost groaned. Seriously, her father was coming too? She wasn't a kit anymore! But then again, he was Heatherpaw's mentor. "I still can't believe my father is your mentor!" She mewed.

"He's good. Kinda prickly at first but nice once you get to know him."

Hollypaw and Heatherpaw waited as Ashfoot fetched Crowfeather. "I can't wait to see the territory. Didn't we have a skirmish with ThunderClan recently?"

"Skirmish?" Emberpaw scoffed. "I wouldn't call a warrior and a medicine cat trespassing a skirmish."

Hollypaw tilted her head to the side. "Who trespassed?"

"ThunderClan's medicine cat and one of the warriors, Ashfur, I think." Heatherpaw said. "They're always getting into trouble. I only heard of it secondhand, only Emberpaw was in the patrol."

"She mentioned needing something in WindClan but Onestar turned her away." Emberpaw shrugged. "We can't afford to give precious herbs or whatever to other Clans. Who knows if the frost will come back? It's been a late New-Leaf. Anyway, I gotta go find Harepaw! Him, Tornear, and Weaselfur are going with me to catch something down in the marshy area by the RiverClan border! See ya!"

Hollypaw watched him run off, scoffing. "The only thing he'll catch is a cold."

Heatherpaw snickered as their mentors came up to them. "Ready to go?" Crowfeather asked.

"Yeah!"

Ashfoot and Crowfeather led the way, breaking into a light jog. Despite the fact that Hollypaw practiced running on a daily basis as a kit she realized how hard it was to keep up even with Heatherpaw. Soon she was lagging behind and panting. Ashfoot slowed down, letting the other two cats take the lead.

"Don't worry, Hollypaw. Once you learn the right technique you won't get so tired so quickly."

Hollypaw tried to catch her breath. "I didn't realize running was so hard! I mean, I knew we had the track but I didn't know we had special ways to run!" A thought struck her-what if she was never fast enough? What if she always got winded so easily? Both her mother and her father were born WindClan cats who ran like the wind, that had to count for something, right? She shoot the doubts off. They wouldn't do her any good.

"You'll get the hang of it," Ashfoot promised as they walked the rest of the way to the border. Crowfeather and Heatherpaw were already there. Crowfeather looked barely ruffled at all by the long run but Heatherpaw was on her belly with her tongue hanging from her mouth and panting. It made Hollypaw feel a little bit better to know she wasn't the only one who struggled with running.

Crowfeather flicked his tail at the two winded apprentices. "Go get a drink, you two. It'll help."

Hollypaw eyed the border stream nervously. "Will we get in trouble? Emberpaw said that there was trouble on the border a while ago."

"You're not crossing or doing anything against the Code." Ashfoot said reassuringly. "If ThunderClan tries anything, which they won't, then the fault belongs with them."

Crowfeather unsheathed his claws. "And if they do try anything they'll get shredded."

Hollypaw nodded and followed Heatherpaw down to the stream to take a drink. Inwardly, she felt warm at the idea that her father would be willing to fight an entire hostile patrol for her even if that wasn't what she wanted to happen. The water was cool on her tongue and did wonders to sate the fiery feeling in the back of her throat.

She was grateful when no ThunderClan patrol came up as they drank and when she went back to Ashfoot she felt a bit more confident by the border. "So, are you going to show me how to get moss?"

Ashfoot nodded and led her over to one of the large oak trees that's trunk was thick with moss. "There's a specific claw movement you need to be able to do for the moss to come off without also taking bits of the bark with you." Ashfoot unsheathed her claws and demonstrated. Hollypaw watched the way she curved her paw and got an even swathe of moss from the trunk.

When she tried to do the same however her claw got caught in the bark and she mrowwed in pain. Crowfeather looked over from where Heatherpaw was also collecting moss-these ones for the elders-in alarm. "Are you alright, Hollypaw?"

"Mouse-dung!" Hollypaw swore as Ashfoot helped try to dislodge her claw. The more she pulled on it though, the more it hurt and Hollypaw yowled as sharp, shooting pains went up her paw. "Ashfoot, I'm stuck! Ashfoot!"

From behind her, Crowfeather and Heatherpaw came running up. "Should I go fetch Barkface?" Heatherpaw asked, kneading the ground with her paws. The sharp desire to help her friend and save her from any oncoming embarrassment radiated off her like clouds right before a storm. Relief washed over Hollypaw like a wave to know she had such a good friend.

Crowfeather took her paw gently between her teeth and tried to lift it up, away from where it'd been caught but that only yanked the claw harder and Hollypaw yowled again in pain.

"Sorry, Hollypaw," he said, letting go of her paw. "Yes, Heatherpaw, go get Barkface. He'll probably have a better idea at what to do."

Heatherpaw didn't need to be told twice. She raced back toward camp, bits of dust and moor grass flying around her.

Hollypaw watched her go, suddenly really feeling the ache in her legs. Crowfeather stood beside her and supported her with his body and Hollypaw leaned on him gratefully.

Suddenly, Ashfoot's ears pricked upward and Hollypaw noticed her claws sliding out of their sheathes. She sniffed the air and a gross, musky odor as becoming stronger. It smelled of leaf mulch and mud, cloying and so thick it made her want to sneeze. "What is _that?_ " she asked.

"ThunderClan." Crowfeather's words were a growl.

ThunderClan! Hollypaw had actually never seen a ThunderClan cat before but she'd heard enough about them to know at least a little. According to Heatherpaw they were big and bulky and could crush you with their bodies but they were slow and not as agile. Prey practically leaped into their paws due to the forest they lived in which meant they didn't prefer the hard work WindClanners went through to catch their food and they were the farthest from StarClan because of the trees that blocked their view. Emberpaw and Harepaw had said that they abandoned kits that they didn't believe would fit in or were strong enough and when they battle trained their used unsheathed claws which was why they all had scars on their body everywhere.

 _I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid. I'm not!_

"Crowfeather, Ashfoot," a cat called out. Hollypaw had to crane her neck to see over her father to the big tomcat that was coming up to the stream. He was _huge_ ; she figured he had to be at least part TigerClan with his tabby pelt and amber eyes. A smaller cream-colored cat with a stubby tail followed him, Hollypaw thought it might be his apprentice. She sniffed the air-there had to be at least two other cats with them, though she couldn't see them yet.

"Brambleclaw." Crowfeather said, curtly. "Berrypaw."

Brambleclaw padded up to the border, head tilted in curiosity. "What are you two up to?"

Hollypaw noticed Crowfeather's shoulder fur rising and the ever-increasing desire that ThunderClan would just mind their own business. But on the other end, she could feel absolutely no desire to be harmful from Brambleclaw, just normal curiosity. Crowfeather opened his mouth to snap a retort but Ashfoot slapped her tail over it before he could say something.

"Just helping a new apprentice collect moss. We ran into some...difficulties."

It was only then that Brambleclaw noticed Hollypaw behind Crowfeather. The faint curiosity that tinged his desires now had changed to some more deeper emotion, something that she couldn't necessarily name. Hollypaw's shoulder fur began to rise as well; she'd never met this cat before in her life! What possibly could be going through his head that made him feel that way?

"Is she stuck?" Brambleclaw asked, peering at Hollypaw again. Hollypaw shrunk down as much as she could behind Crowfeather. Being seen stuck like this with her own Clanmates was one thing-by a warrior of an enemy clan was entirely different!

"Just goes to show that WindClan cats shouldn't have anything to do with trees!" That was the cream-colored apprentice. Hollypaw lashed her tail at the mocking tone in his voice. "All they do is get stuck and even more useless than before!"

Brambleclaw whirred on his apprentice, giving him a bat over the ear with sheathed claws. "You do not talk like that to other Clans _especially_ when there's no conflict with them!" He then turned to the WindClan cats. "Apologies. It seems my apprentice still hasn't learned the basics of respect. A moon of doing the elder's ticks should help him remember."

"What!"

"Go back to camp, Berrypaw. Now." Berrypaw looked like he was about to protest until he saw the look on Brambleclaw's face and took off in the other direction. "Do you need help? Our medicine cat is picking herbs around here somewhere."

"I don't believe that will be necessary," Ashfoot said, "One of our patrol has gone to fetch Barkface and should be back any time by now."

Ashfoot's words could've been lost in the wind for all they mattered because one moment Brambleclaw was there and the next he was dashing off into the brush to get the medicine cat.

"ThunderClan! Always getting into business not their own!" Crowfeather spat. A strong wave of desire to take Hollypaw in his scruff and run with her back to came crashed over her. Sure, Hollypaw knew her father was protective but what was going on here? Which ThunderClan cat made dirt in his fresh-kill?

The bushes rustled again and Brambleclaw came back out with a she-cat and a younger tom. Instantly, Hollypaw knew the younger tom would rather be anywhere else than where he was right now. He hated the smell of herbs, hated the taste of them when he picked them, and most of all hated the fact that he couldn't see and had to become a medicine cat. If he could've he would've shredded the herbs he was carrying and run back to where his brother was training with his new mentor.

The she-cat's desires were more muted, almost like they were covered by a large fluffy cloud. Her amber eyes were full of concern though and strangely, they looked at Hollypaw like they'd seen her somewhere before even though Hollypaw couldn't remember this brown-and-white tabby for the life of her.

"Leafpool," Crowfeather greeted. "And that must be Jaypaw." He nodded at the blind apprentice.

"Crowfeather, Ashoot." Leafpool's voice was cool but it almost seemed like it was just being protected by a fragile glass that would break at any moment.

"Leafpool," Ashfoot said. "This is my apprentice, Hollypaw."

Hollypaw let out an irritated hiss. Couldn't they just let her go unnoticed before the entirety of ThunderClan realized she was stuck to a tree? Too late, she remembered Brambleclaw had gotten Leafpool to get her unstuck.

Leafpool's eyes followed Ashfoot's until they came upon Hollypaw's. "Hello, Hollypaw." Her voice was quiet, wavering slightly. "Are you okay?"

"Well," Hollypaw said, unable to keep the sarcasm from her voice. "Other than being stuck to a tree by my claw and feeling like I'm about to fall over any minute, I'm doing just dandy." Leafpool winced and shame flooded through Hollypaw, making her ears go hot. "I'm sorry, that was rude. I've just been like this for a while and I'm really tired and everything hurts."

"You're forgiven," Leafpool said, voice still very quiet. "May I help?" She directed the question to Ashfoot, looking directly past Crowfeather like he wasn't even here.

"Why would you help?" Her apprentice asked. "If WindClan was dumb enough to get into that mess, WindClan can get out of it themselves!"

"Jaypaw!" Leafpool raised her voice, "Medicine cats are pledged to stand aside Clan rivalries!"

"Well, I don't want to be a medicine cat!" the apprentice spat.

"Jaypaw!" Brambleclaw said. "back to camp, now! And you can help Berrypaw with his tick duty!"

Jaypaw's fur raised but he turned around and whirled back to camp.

 _I hope he runs into a tree._ Hollypaw thought, fuming. Who taught ThunderClan apprentices any manners?

"I'm very sorry for our apprentices today," Brambleclaw said to Hollypaw as Leafpool began to gently work her claw out of the bark. Hollypaw grit her teeth and held back a hiss, feeling bad for Leafpool despite her apprentice's terrible behavior. Who would want such a disrespectful apprentice? Not her, that was for sure. "They aren't usually like this."

"Perhaps your queens should make sure they learn their manners before they leave their nests."

Was it just her or was Crowfeather looking at Leafpool when he said that?

Brambleclaw ignored the barb right as Leafpool managed to get Hollypaw's claw out of the bark. Hollypaw let out one more shriek of pain before gingerly standing on her hurt paw. Her claw felt like it was on fire, but at least she was able to stand again. "Thank you, Leafpool."

"Thank you for your help," Ashfoot said.

Crowfeather still said nothing but even without being able to feel his desire, Hollypaw could tell he wanted to leave as soon as possible.

Hollypaw watched as the two ThunderClan cats walked back toward their camp with another 'farewell' and how Leafpool looked back twice at her.

Hollypaw shook her head. "ThunderClan cats are weird."

"That they are," Crowfeather said. "C'mon, let's get back to camp before Barkface finds he came all this way for nothing."

Hollypaw nodded and followed her father and Ashfoot back to camp but in her mind she kept thinking of the ThunderClan medicine cat and the odd way she looked at her as they left.


	6. Chapter 4: Introspection

Chapter Four: Who?

Leafpool couldn't help looking back at Hollypaw-her own daughter!-as she left the WindClan border. Brambleclaw fell in beside her, his tailtip brushing her shoulder. "Are you okay, Leafpool?" he asked, his voice low and quiet.

"Jaypaw and her didn't remember each other," she said quietly. "She didn't remember me." It hurt to say that. Of course it had been a risk with Hollypaw going to WindClan so young. But somewhere deep in her heart she had clung onto the hope that she would have remembered her mother and brothers. But she didn't. Maybe it was easier that way for her even if it was hard for Leafpool. She knew that Jaypaw and Lionpaw already felt like they didn't really belong even if the entire clan did accept them. Hollypaw might be spared those feelings if she didn't know her true parentage.

She was struck by how much her daughter looked like Crowfeather. There were differences of course, the eye color, the fluffiness of her pelt, but no one could deny that she was Crowfeather's daughter. It hurt to think of who Hollypaw believed her mother might be; obviously not Leafpool. She knew that Onestar had taken her young in order for her to bond better with the new queen in the nursery. Did that queen treat Hollypaw right? Was she resentful that she wasn't truly her kit? Worries churned in her stomach like a tough bit of fresh-kill. Surely Crowfeather would make sure their daughter was treated well.

Leafpool padded back into camp, heading towards the medicine den. Squirrelflight caught her eye, head tilting with an unspoken question. Leafpool shook her head, she couldn't talk about it right now. She needed to lose herself into her work.

Inside the den, Jaypaw was grumbling under his breath as he sorted the herbs they collected with more force than was necessary. "Jaypaw," Leafpool said. "Please be careful, those herbs are no used to us if they're ruined."

Jaypaw lashed his tail but softened the movements of his paws.

She sighed. Lionpaw seemed to be doing well with his apprenticeship. He was getting along well with his mentor (it had worried Leafpool at first that Ashfur was his mentor as he'd been very vocal against the kits when she first revealed her pregnancy) and bouncing with undiminished energy from dawn to dusk. He took to being a warrior apprentice well, picking up the moves quickly and mastering them with a speed that didn't seem possible for a new apprentice. Jaypaw on the other hand...she knew he felt useless, she knew he didn't want to be a medicine cat despite the obvious connection he had with StarClan and his aptitude with herbs. She couldn't blame him-if he hadn't been born blind then so many other doors would've been open to him. Even if he only had one working eye-Brightheart couldn't see or hear on one side and she was a wonderful warrior. But he was born the way he was born and there was nothing Leafpool could do besides be there for him.

She sat next to her son, tail curling around them. "Jaypaw, do you want to talk?"

The grey tabby looked toward her voice. "If you're going to scold me again-"

"I'm not," Leafpool promised. "You seemed troubled."

Jaypaw scuffed the ground with his paw, unseeing eyes looking far, far away. He crouched down a bit, almost like he felt threatened, and there was a long beat before he spoke. "Am I a punishment?"

Shock flooded through Leafpool like lightening. "A punishment? What?"

"From StarClan. I don't know...I overheard one of the elders saying that my blindness and everything was a punishment from StarClan because I shouldn't exist."

Leafpool's claws dug rivets into the dirt and a growl rumbled deep in her throat. She couldn't fight, she had the basic training every medicine cat had but she doubted she could take the entire elder's den by herself, take on everyone who said these things. She was meant for healing, not fighting, but the thought of cats making _her kits_ feeling like they were a punishment, that they didn't belong...she would tear them apart. No one treated her kits like that. No one.

"Are you mad?" Jaypaw asked, crouching down lower. Leafpool quickly reeled herself in. Jaypaw was always more sensitive to a cat's inner feelings than most, whether it was just a gift or something more, she didn't know. But she knew that he could easily interprete things to be his fault or about him if some cat let him.

"I am mad," Leafpool allowed, "But not at you. Never at you. You are _not_ a punishment from StarClan. You and your brother and your s-" Leafpool caught herself before she finished the word, "You two are the best things that have ever happened to me. You are a gift, Jaypaw. If StarClan meant for you to be a punishment, do you think they'd give you such a strong connection with them? Such an aptitude for herbs? No. They had no right to say that, none. And they won't say it anymore. I promise you."

Jaypaw broke out into a raspy purr as Leafpool licked him between the ears. "I'm sorry I was angry today. I shouldn't have taunted that WindClan apprentice. I just...I don't know."

"I understand," Leafpool said, mind immediately going back to Hollypaw. She wished Jaypaw and Lionpaw could know that they had a sibling in WindClan, but Firestar had a point when they discussed it. The idea might've been too painful, loyalties would be tested. Both kits didn't even know who their father was, which she knew was probably for the best. She trusted her father's judgment.

It didn't mean she had to like it.

* * *

"I still can't believe you got your claw stuck in a tree," Hollypaw's ears were flattened against her head. If Emberpaw mentioned it _one more time_ she was going to tear his ears up. Currently her claw was wrapped in one of Barkface's poultices. Kestrelpaw had been with him as he did it, observing so that he could do the same thing next time. Ugh. Hollypaw hoped that there wouldn't be a next time.

"Emberpaw, you say one more word and I personally will make sure you cannot sit properly again for an entire moon."

Emberpaw's eyes widened. "You're crazy, Hollypaw."

"Try me."

Emberpaw seemed to not want to take the chance because he dashed out of the medicine den quicker than a hare.

From deeper in the medicine den, Hollypaw heard chuckling. "It's not funny, Barkface!"

Barkface came back from the stores, pushing out some old herbs that had gone back. "I'm sorry, Hollypaw. You just remind me so much of Crowfeather, sometimes."

Hollypaw cocked her head to the side. "Is that a bad thing?"

Barkface shook his head. "Of course not. It just reminds me of some of the times I had him in here. He was a pawful as an apprentice."

That piqued her curiosity. "Really?"

"Yes! My Starclan, he would sneak out to go hunting when he was supposed to be resting and would constantly ignore my orders! Once he had a cold that turned into whitecough because he wouldn't stop working and just rest." Barkface shook his head fondly. "He always felt like he had to prove himself."

That made sense. Sometimes when she was with her father, she felt deep down in the sense she always felt when it came to other cats, that he desired to prove himself. It made no sense to her. He was a loyal WindClan warrior, a good father, and even though he wasn't mates with her mother anymore, he still treated her with the utmost respect. Hollypaw had been maybe three moons old when Nightcloud told her that she and Crowfeather were not mates anymore. At first, she'd worried that it would ruin her family, but in the end nothing had changed. Crowfeather had still visited both of them in the nursery constantly, still was affectionate toward Nightcloud in a friendly way, and obviously held nothing against her. She supposed some cats were just better off as friends.

"Do you know Leafpool?" the question came without thought. The ThunderClan medicine cat was odd. She was nice and all, but Hollypaw couldn't throw off the feeling that she felt very awkward around her. She was one of the few cats that she couldn't seem to get a read on. Sure, she was nice and all, but most cats were a bit more transparent. She could feel at least somewhat what they really wanted or desired to do. With Leafpool, it was like staring at a dark pond. Still, she was a nice cat. Hollypaw felt a little bad for her, her apprentice was so mean. But, in the end, Hollypaw could also feel that he didn't want to be where he was.

It made sense. Hollypaw couldn't even imagine being a medicine cat. Just because Jaypaw was blind, he was in a role he didn't necessarily want. It wasn't fair, but then again, they were Clan cats. There wasn't much diversity in the roles they could have.

From beside her, Hollypaw noticed Barkface looking away. "Yes," he said, voice cautious. "Like all medicine cats, we go to the Moonpool together every half-moon. Why?"

Hollypaw shrugged. "She just seemed sad."

Barkface sighed. "She's had a rough go of it. Her mentor died not too long ago when badgers attacked their camp."

"Oh," Hollypaw said. She couldn't imagine Ashfoot dying. She didn't want to. "Crowfeather mentioned that once, the badger thing."

"Yes," Was that wariness she detected in Barkface's voice. "He and a few other WindClan cats helped them in the fight."

"How?"

"How what?"

"How did they know the fight was happening? Was there a messenger?"

Barkface looked slightly alarmed, which confused her. What about her question was alarming? He stuck his head out of the den. "Oh, it looks like Ashfoot is looking for you."

Sighing, she exited the medicine den. Of course, she didn't want to be stuck in there forever but it really did feel like Barkface was hiding something from her. Whatever was up with the ThunderClan medicine cat, she didn't seem like a popular topic for the WindClan cats. She couldn't forget the unease that radiated off Ashfoot and Crowfeather when Leafpool helped her get unstuck. Did Leafpool do something bad to WindClan? Hollypaw wasn't sure.

Hollypaw was going to find out.

 **AN:**

 **So, how did you like the chapter? Hollypaw and her siblings in ThunderClan have no memories of each other, which was the goal with separating them so young. Due to that, I thought it made sense that the cats of ThunderClan and WindClan played into that. Jaypaw and Lionpaw don't know who their father is, only that their mother is Leafpool. Hollypaw believes that Nightcloud and Crowfeather are her parents. Since Nightcloud and Crowfeather were supposedly mates when they had Hollykit, they decided to 'break up' when she was 3 moons old so that they wouldn't have to fake a relationship. Due to this, neither have very negative feels for the other and have remained close friends. It's a delicate balance between the lies and the truth right now, but Hollypaw seems determined to find out what the deal with Leafpool is!**


End file.
